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i tried

this song, i wrote you,
tried to place you
within the span of a
couple minutes, but i
feel i’ve placed myself
against an obstacle–
you’re too much
for words, for a head,
for a song,
for a breath.

we met as friends often do,
me despising you, you
dealing with issues other
than i’m accustomed to.
you handled it well, i
saw something i wanted
in you.. that
look of being
more than who you masquerade as.
years went by,
you moved on,
i did, too, but, must admit,
you still held a spot
within these thoughts
of loneliness and then
you came around again,
perhaps by accident–
i’d like to think so–
you showed
the You again
i Knew before
and i closed these eyes
to picture you
but no words
live or written could
know you, same. i tilted head
to try my hand
at placing you
within the boundaries
of the limited..
yet you raised, everytime,
to low this heart to
steady thump
as though you knew i
could never resist you, still..
i tried for you.
told you
all the words
i thought would never
see the day,
but still you went your way.
asked to move, i gave my stance
so you may know
something worthy, you.
the days spun by so hole found way
of growing deeper in me
’til, lost, i found you,
closing my hands around you
only to be told
nothing could be planted/grow.
yet you kept me close,
offering a glimpse
more of you
i had never known..
wishing more, i
hoped you’d ‘llow me
hold you here,
though, gone, you
knew nothing
nothing would let you stay
as you lay ‘side another.
still, i
as crash gave force
i knew not where to place,
so easily ‘pon you these
nerves find rest,
find warmth, find
as to be softened, slumped.

no, it isn’t okay.

not really a song. not really that good. stream.

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musings & scribbles