hope can be just as bad as anger

confusion reigns for
as long as clarity squats
in recesses, calmly holding
on to knowledge while
trying to close eyes
being kept open by
beating veins unseen,
but known by caricature.
and each tremor shakes
confidence, laid flat
with arms spread wide
and legs lending no
helping hand to holding
on to a floor worn by
pacings of patience, they
who know nothing more than
presence, yet are fine
with that; smile forms,
and all is twisted
slightly as the light
comes in to welcome
inner world to outside.
and pain digs in, trying
hard to find a place to
surround itself with
walls and keep itself
away from out there, where
laughing, that most violent
of actions, comes and hastens
the burying.
now, clarity stands to
walk away the reasons and excuses
creeping in and throwing
dirt on top of pain, hoping
to hide happenings underfoot,
but walking on is not walking away.
now, clarity speaks to
clear the cavern of the hollowed feelings
wrapped around themselves, and knowledge
chases away confusion, swatting
at the reasons and excuses, growing
at its taile as feet bound feet to keep
the foolery at bay.

and my head swivels under water,
trying to find the sky, but the
sand looks so comfortable,
sweet bed of ships & fairy tales,
incubator of necessity,
but the sky is calling back its breath,
and i can’t forget my family,
though they may appreciate the
work my toes have done to make lines
and holes in the softest ground

hope can be just as bad as anger